What Women Want?

A good friend sent this link:

What Do Women Want?

He sent it in the context of a conversation we had recently had about how, post-divorce/separation for both us, we've found so many progressive, confident women who seem to be looking to be dominated, and how after both being married to third-wave feminists for a decade or more, that was neither of our defaults. I took notes for my response to him while I was reading:

-An article with the title "What Women Want" turns me off immediately, and makes me assume the author doesn't know anything about what women want, and subscribes to gender stereotyping. But I'll keep reading.

-"While the subjects watched on a computer screen, Chivers, who favors high boots and fashionable rectangular glasses" - Did we need to know what she was wearing? Was the author trying to tell us something about her sexuality by describing her manner of dress? Would we have gotten that info if the researcher was male?

-I really like how she turned around the issue of rape fantasies or arousal with a survival instinct rather than a justification for unwanted sex or the idea that "women want it." That was good.

-It's lame that the second researcher thought dyspareunia was a "disfunction" or something that was a result of a woman's lack of heterosexual desire, as if PIV sex or penetration was crucial or critical to sexual enjoyment, and needed treatment.

-The punchline to our recent conversations is the "caring caveman" idea, no?

-"Arousal is not consent." That's an excellent, amazing statement.

Discuss amongst yourselves. And ask, What Would Twisty Say?

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